The Indigo Wombat (indigowombat) wrote in neuropride,
The Indigo Wombat
indigowombat
neuropride

There was a lot I needed to say, and explain. I think I've finally more or less gotten it across. I could be wrong about that, of course. But now that I feel like I've expressed it sufficiently thoroughly and completely, a shift is happening inside. I'm curious to see where it will take me. Probably just on with my work, but in a calmer, more sedate way, now that the initial burst of energy has died down. The enthusiasm and focus of AS can be useful, but pretty intense sometimes, both for me and those around me. It's part of who I am, and it's actually healthy for me, with the brain I have, to honor that part of me, and let it express itself when it needs to. Repressing it can lead to dysfunction, and I'm doing my best to heal from the consequences of that kind of repression over time. Expressing it can be hard, but practice makes perfect, and hopefully next time it'll be a little easier and smoother, and perhaps not so intense for those around me. A lot of the things I have to express are pretty unusual, though, and it's important for me to let that be okay. Some people are going to be uncomfortable with the things I say and do. Some people will be unsettled. But then again, I'm often uncomfortable and unsettled by the words and actions of others, though it's what feels natural to them. As long as it's not actually causing me harm, though, I do my best to use that discomfort to help me reexamine myself and look at things from a different point of view, and that's of great benefit to me, when I can learn from it. It's only fair for me to give others the opportunity to see my point of view, as well; since it's more unusual, it's probably more important to give it voice. That's why I care so much about neuropride. I think the unique perspectives that we have to offer the world are needed, and should not be silenced and lost. Expressed responsibly, yes, but expressed clearly and strongly. That's what I'm aiming for. And I'm getting there, bit by bit, even if the road is a bit uncomfortable every once in a while. I didn't choose this direction to be comfortable. I chose it to adapt to my discomfort, and to help others adapt to their discomfort with me, without disrespecting either myself or them. It's a learning process, for everyone involved. And I'm ready and willing to learn.
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Yup :-) You know, of course, of the boddhisattvas, those who are "graced" with enlightenment and then pledge to return until all have attained Oneness. So it is. Lured by the Light to attain the Light and then to pass it on :-) Is cool. Leaving the constraints and embracing them--nothing new, everything is the same. Kind of :-)

Kind of :-P
Yep. :) I love that mindset. Stories like that are very inspiring to me. :) I think we all have the potential for that kind of holiness, if we are willing to embrace that potential and practice it.
True :-) Say, do you get Orion online? They have a very nice piece by Derrick Jensen about the practicality and desirablity of "giving up hope". He kinda says that "hoping" leads down a blind path that does not lead to action and to love of self, etc. I will get the link and post it here :-)
I don't, actually. I'd love to see a link. I've got a book by Derrick Jensen, "The Culture of Make-Believe". Provocative stuff. Darker in tone than I normally am comfortable with, but he makes it work and it's appropriate to the gravity of the material. That's the only piece of his work I've read, though.

I think, based on what you're saying about his take on hope, that he and I have different definitions of the word. I think hope is a positive, but it's important to back it up by acting on that hope. It's not enough on its own, but I think it's an important part of action.

I've added you to my friends list, by the way. :)
Link: http://www.oriononline.org/pages/om/06-3om/Jensen.html

I now think of "hope" in terms of belief and knowing, accepting and being/becoming the goal. But, here is the man. I read his first book A Language Older than Words (?) and tried, briefly, to read the second. He is really part of a long involvement with Ishmael by Daniel Quinn, which is another day entirely :-)

Thanks for the link. I like the way he talks about what he believes in. I don't entirely agree with his perspective, but I think it's a valuable one, and I'm glad that he speaks out with it. :)
Yeah, he dares to say wht he feels and it resonates with many :-) Way cool :-)